No Words

Pairs well with: "The Story" by Brandi Carlile and "In My Life" by The Beatles

One month from today I will begin the Komen 3 Day, a 60 mile walking journey through Atlanta.  Today I was reminded why I agreed to take on this challenge.  Today I found out that a woman I met (through my Myriad Genetics network of friends) lost her long battle with breast cancer.  She was exactly 2 years & 1 day older than me, born on Oct 17, 1971.  She was a wife and the mother of 5 young children.  She fought like crazy, but unfortunately was unable to win the battle.  As I read the note informing me of her passing I sobbed.  And every time I think of her and the sweet family she left behind I cry again.  I just can't stop. 

 I know that I'm just one person.  And to a lot of people me walking 60 miles "to end breast cancer" is a silly idea.  What's walking going to do?  How am I, an almost 40 year old woman, going to help find a cure to this terrible disease?  The only answer I can come up with is this: I don't know.  I don't know if a cure's going to be discovered in my lifetime.  But I do know that I can't stand the idea of how empty my friend's house must feel tonight for her kids.  I can't stand the idea of how cold her side of the bed is going to be to her husband, now a widow.  What about the lunches that need to be packed tomorrow morning, and the exciting walk to school chatting the whole time about who's going to play with whom at recess and wondering what snacks they're going to get in the afternoon, how about this weekend's soccer games, and everyone gathering upstairs tonight to watch the new Ghostbusters DVD over & over again?  What about field trips to the pumpkin patch, and the school's 1 mile fun run on Friday night, and everyone taking turns at the dinner table talking about their favorite part of the day?  What about her upcoming 42nd birthday party?  

These are all the things I do every day and am thinking about in the coming days - for myself.  I could be her.  And I can't imagine how scared I'd be if I was as sick as she was and had been for quite a while.  And I can't imagine how helpless it must feel to be weakened by a disease and it's attempted cure.  And I can't, for the life of me, imagine how it feels knowing that you're going to die and leave behind this life, this precious life and every little thing that fills it up and makes it unforgettable and brilliant and funny and joyful and exhilarating and beautiful. 

I know that I would hope that someone was "on my side" and willing to fight with me AND for me. 

That's why I'm walking.

I can't just sit around and hope that something happens.  I want to be a part of the something happening.

Thanks from the bottom of my heart to every single special friend who's sponsored me, who believes in me, who will cheer for me & my team and who will pray for every person who's life has been affected by breast cancer.